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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26563819">This Love</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/conatozaki37/pseuds/conatozaki37'>conatozaki37</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>TWICE (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, F/F</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 09:55:42</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,122</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26563819</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/conatozaki37/pseuds/conatozaki37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"I love you. You know I always will. But I'm sorry we... we've become miserable. You and I both know it. I love you Dahyun but... I have to go."</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kim Dahyun/Minatozaki Sana</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>This Love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This was inspired by This Love SaiDa AU in youtube, created by klosseted. Go check it out if you haven’t already (I placed the link before the start of the story). Check out his/her other works too if you’re a diehard SaiDa stan like me. They’re all so good, you won’t regret watching ‘em all. :)</p><p>There’ll be a lot of flashbacks in this story (it’s basically made of flashbacks hehe), so I hope you won’t get too confused with them. I’ll try to make it as clear as I can. Anyways, hope you enjoy the story. :)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/ku00yvX1Ik8">https://youtu.be/ku00yvX1Ik8</a>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>Clear blue water, high tide, came and brought you in</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>And I could go on and on, on and on, and I will</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>Skies grow darker, currents swept you out again</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>And you were just gone and gone, gone and gone…</strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>DAHYUN’S POV</strong>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It’s been exactly 3 years since I last saw her. Last time I’ve talked to her, last time I’ve tasted her sweet soft lips brushing against mine; the bittersweet taste that still lingers in my tongue doesn’t help one bit because it still hurts the same. It hurts like it happened yesterday, like she just left my already breaking heart.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>I could pretend like everything’s okay, that I’d moved on; but a happy smile can only serve as a mask to people who don’t know me at all. God knows Chaeyoung isn’t buying it at all. But she keeps quiet, knowing full well that it is my own way of coping. How could she not? She was my best friend since I could remember, a sister even, if you consider everything we’ve been through together. And she loved her as well.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Her.</p><p>My greatest love.</p><p>My biggest heartache.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I’m heading out now Chaengie. Don’t wait up for me okay? I think I’ll be working overtime tonight”</em>, I told her as I headed out the door.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>I saw how she furrowed her brows, showing her concern. I know she’s got a lot of things to say. She’s been trying to get me to open up since everything happened, but she just respects me too much to do anything. It’s so not like Chaeyoung. Usually she’s the persistent type, someone who won’t stop until she gets things done. I guess it’s affected a lot of people more than I could imagine. Jeongyeon rarely even visits anymore, and I’ve never even heard from Nayeon since. Mina comes once in a while, mostly to comfort me and Chae. Tzuyu? I’ve never talked to Tzuyu ever since. I’d like to think that I still hate her like before, but I can’t really blame her. It wasn’t her fault that she was there to break her fall when I was too stubborn to catch her myself. I think I haven’t talked to her since because we just naturally drifted apart, our friendship long forgotten. I had thought about reconnecting with her, but what’s the use? I don’t think either of us is ready anyways.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Are you sure you don’t wanna hang out tonight? Mina said she’s coming over. She’s bringing some of our favorite flicks. We don’t mind the company, we just want to you know…”</em>, she stopped mid sentence after I hugged her for reassurance.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“I’m fine Chaeng.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>I wasn’t.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>But I don’t wanna drag my friends any further down with me. It’s about time I face my own demons. But god it’s so hard to face them without my angel beside me.</p><p> </p><p>God I miss you so much…</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>(Flashback) </strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Guess who?”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>With soft hands covering her eyes and a sweet lemon scent engulfing all her senses, a smile crept onto Dahyun’s face as she tried to tease the older girl in return.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Um… Jieun-eonni?”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>She succeeded with the teasing, earning her a playful slap on the arm and a soft kiss on the cheek.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Stop. That’s not even funny.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun faced the older girl with a cheeky grin only to be met with a pouting face.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“You know I was only teasing. How could I ever mistake those soft lips for someone else”</em>, Dahyun replied planting a quick peck into the older girl’s lips.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The older girl could only blush and smile shyly at the gesture.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“You know I love that shade of pink on you. It suits you so well”</em>, Dahyun says smoothly.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Ah… But my Dahyunnie is such a sweet talker huh?”</em>, she answers back, not even bothering to hide her blush anymore.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>With this, Dahyun takes her hand as she leads her to the rooftop of their apartment building.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Come on! I need to show you something!”</em>, she tugs at the older girl’s hand excitedly as they climb the stairs.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Upon arriving at the rooftop, they were greeted by the beautiful sight of Seoul’s evening sky. The city lights glimmered as brightly as the stars which were perfectly blanketed by the velvet sky; ironically complementing each other. The moon was shining in all its glory, completing the overall feel of the evening. Beautiful was an understatement. It was more of magical. All the more magical for Dahyun because of the special girl standing beside her on the rooftop’s railing taking in all of the scenery before them.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>She saw Dahyun staring from her peripherals. She smiled but didn’t mind facing her when she spoke in her native tongue.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“The moon is beautiful tonight, isn’t it, Dahyun-chan?”</em>, she said in Japanese.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun looked in wonder,<em> “are you saying you like me?”</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>This time she faced Dahyun, wrapping her slender arms around her neck pulling her close.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Take a guess…”</em>, she answered while staring intently into Dahyun’s eyes.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>With that, Dahyun wrapped her arms around her waist, pulling her even closer (if it was even possible). She touched their foreheads together, not breaking their eye contact, as if asking for permission. A quick nod was all she needed as she crashed her lips to the older’s soft ones, eliminating any space left between them.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>(End of flashback) </strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Are you sure she’s okay? I mean it’s today right?”</em>, Mina asked worriedly from the other line.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I don’t know babe. She looked… empty. But I couldn’t stop her”</em>, Chaeyoung answered through the phone.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Then you shouldn’t have let her go Chaeng. You know how she breaks down without warning sometimes”</em>, Mina replied.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I know, I know. I’m sorry. But I just can’t… We can’t force ourselves and try to fix her Mina. We could only be here for her while she heals herself. Dahyun’s stubborn. We all know it. Forcing ourselves to break through her walls is a futile attempt to get her to open up”</em>, Chaeyoung answered sadly.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“I know… I’m just… I’m worried about her Chaeng. It’s been three years.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Me too Mina… But…”</em>, Chaeyoung tried to answer as she held back her tears.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I know. Please don’t… I’ll be there soon”</em>, Mina said soothingly.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Okay. I’ll see you soon. Drive safe okay?”</em>, Chaeyoung replied before ending the call.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I thought I told you to take the night off?”</em>, Jihyo emerged from her office once she was notified that the pianist had arrived.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I know Eonni, but I’ve got nothing else to do. Besides I need the extra bucks. Also, are you that desperate to get rid of me?”,</em> Dahyun tried to joke but Jihyo saw the sadness in her eyes.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jihyo shook her head as she answered with a sad smile, <em>“You know you’re always welcome here. It’s just…”</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun squeezed Jihyo’s shoulder to stop her from continuing, <em>“Why does everyone worry so much? Stop worrying about me guys, I’m fine”</em>, she tried her best to smile genuinely.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>But Jihyo saw through it, she always does. It’s one of her gifts. But at times like this, she hated herself for being able to read people too well. She could only sigh in defeat.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Okay then. Help yourself with the treats. I’ll be at my office if you need anything”</em>, she answers the younger.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Will do”</em>, Dahyun replied before heading to the small stage.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jihyo looked empathetically back at Dahyun one more time before retreating to her office.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>In silent screams, and wildest dreams</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>I never dreamed of this...</strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>(Flashback) </strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“What’s wrong with you lately? It’s like I don’t even know you anymore”</em>, Dahyun asked desperately.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Please Dahyun. Not now. I don’t feel like talking. I’m just… I’m just tired okay?”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“You’re tired? Well that’s just rich”</em>, Dahyun scoffed.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The older girl could only sigh loudly in return.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Oh so that’s how it’s gonna be? You don’t want to talk to me? And here I am wanting for you to open up. I want to make things right, but you keep pushing me away. Why? What did I ever do to you? Am I not good enough anymore? What?! Have you found someone else? Is it because of Tzu-“</em>, Dahyun bit her tongue before the name could roll out of it.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>But she caught it and her blood boiled with the bitter accusation coming from the younger.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“SAY IT!”</em>, she couldn’t hold it in anymore as she spat those words full of venom.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun flinched as the older girl shook with rage. Her warm doe eyes were filled with a mixture of anger and hurt. And Dahyun couldn’t look at them so she tried to avert her gaze.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I dare you to say it to my face...”, </em>she started, tears threating to fall from her eyes.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun could only stare at the floor. Guilty, embarrassed and hurt. <em>‘How did it come to this’</em>, she thought to herself.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>There was a deafening silence before the older girl decided to break it, knowing full well that the younger wouldn’t dare to talk. It’s always been like that between them. She always had to be the one to confront the problem head on. She always had to be the bigger person. But she had to. She was older after all. More matured. More rational. And she hated it.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“You couldn’t say it now could you?”</em>, she spoke coldly. <em>“Tzuyu.”</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun flinched once more as she heard the name. Hearing her most hated name pierced her heart. But she wouldn’t show it. She was stubborn. Everyone knew that.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“You really think this is because of Tzuyu, Dahyun? Really? Is that how you think of me?”,</em> she scoffed before continuing. <em>“To think you would’ve known me by now. After all these years… Really?”</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun wanted to speak up. She wanted to express herself. Tell her that she’s sorry for assuming anything without basis. She wanted to hold her, and kiss her, and tell her that she wanted to work things out. She did. It was all playing smoothly in her head. But she couldn’t. She was weak. She was stubborn. And she hated it.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“You really want to know what’s been bugging me lately, huh Dahyun?”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Silence.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“It’s always been like this. Why can’t you be forward with me for once?”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>She said as tears started pouring from her eyes. She didn’t mind wiping them. She wanted the younger to see how broken she’d become.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun took a quick glance at the girl in front of her and the view broke her heart even more. But she stood there like a stone. Not being able to convey her feelings. Not being able to comfort the love of her life. She was stubborn. Everyone knew. And now more than ever, she hated herself for not being able to save them from the heartache. Dahyun was a coward and she didn’t do anything to disprove it otherwise.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“We’ve been distant for the longest time. We don’t talk to each other anymore. It used to be so easy with you; so light and wonderful. You took my breath away with all the efforts and grand gestures. I guess it’s my fault too for depending on you too much. You made me feel like you’re all I ever needed. But you… No… We… We’ve changed Dahyun. We’ve changed for the worst. And I couldn’t do anything about it. We didn’t do anything about it. We carried on like nothing was wrong, and now that everything’s piled up, it’s just too heavy of a burden to carry around anymore.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Their tears blurred out everything, just like how hazy everything about them had become.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Tzuyu, she’s a friend Dahyun. She listened when you wouldn’t. She provided warmth when you’ve turned so cold. She tried to make me smile when all I did was cry from thinking of and longing too much for you. You could think otherwise, but she’s just a friend. She’s always been just a friend. But she’s a friend who was always there for me, when you couldn’t.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p>  </p><p><em>“I…”</em>, Dahyun tried, she really did. But the words wouldn’t come out.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The older girl looked at her longingly, hoping the younger would finally speak up; giving her once last chance.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Nothing.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“I love you. You know I always will. But I’m sorry we… we’ve become miserable. You and I both know it. I love you Dahyun but… I have to go…”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun was a coward, and she lost the love of her life because of it.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>(End of flashback) </strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>***</strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun didn’t even realize she was crying until her fingers slipped from the piano keys because of the tears that pooled on them, giving off a broken note from the beautifully played melody. Never once did that memory leave her mind. It kept playing on repeat like a broken record, leaving her with restless nights and unending nightmares. No matter what she did, the guilt in her heart never left. She had to carry on. She tried to carry on. But she couldn’t.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Too many nights had she drowned herself with alcohol and cigarettes just to numb the pain, if only to free her temporarily. Her anxiety didn’t help either. And with everything else going on, depression was inevitable. It took them an entire year of convincing but eventually Chaeyoung and Mina had persuaded her to go to rehab. And so Dahyun tried to pick herself up for her friends. She was broken, but she didn’t want to break everyone else who loved her too. So she tried. But fixing her addiction and depression didn’t automatically fix her as well. Her heart was still very much broken. That was something she knew she couldn’t fix even if she tried. But she had to pretend. It was the least she could do for her friends; for the ones who never left her side.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>She tried to move on, tried to find someone else to think about. She’s met a few people, but nothing could ever compare to the love she felt from a certain doe-eyed girl. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>Tossing, turning, struggle through the night with someone new</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>And I could go on and on, on and on</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>Lanterns burning, flickered in the mind, only you</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>But you were still gone, gone, gone</strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>(Flashback) </strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Dahyun! Dahyun wake up sweetie”</em>, Momo tried to shake the sleeping girl beside her.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun was shaking uncontrollably; beads of sweat forming on her forehead as she stirred in her sleep. She opened her eyes and was breathing hard. It was that same dream, that same memory.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“You were having nightmares again, weren’t you?”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Momo tried to soothe the girl, gently caressing her cheeks.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun could only nod as she tried to control her breathing. Truth is, her chest wanted to explode from being reminded of that memory, but she wouldn’t show it.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Maybe I can fix that for you.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Momo leaned in connecting their lips. She wanted to kiss it all away. Dahyun closed her eyes, trying to feel the kiss. Desperately hoping this time it’d work. Hoping this girl would finally make her forget.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>She had never been more wrong.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Momo’s kisses were wet and hungry, which made her miss the sweet and soft kisses all the more. Her touches were daring and eager, which made her think of the warm and affectionate ones instead. It’s like the more she tried to forget, the more she remembered instead. And maybe just maybe, she loved it that way. Maybe she didn’t really want to forget. Maybe she wanted to remember everything, because even if it caused her immeasurable pain, it was ironically her only source of comfort as well.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Momo… I think this isn’t going to work”</em>, she said softly while trying to avoid the other girl’s gaze.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“WHAT?!”</em>, Momo scoffed as if unable to believe what she was hearing.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I’m sorry, but you need to leave”</em>, is all Dahyun could say.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Momo couldn’t erase the look of annoyance from her face, <em>“you’re unbelievable”</em>, she said as she stormed out of the apartment.</p><p>
  <em>  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>(End of flasback) </strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>Been losing grip, on sinking ships</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>You showed up just in time</strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It was raining hard that night, and she didn’t want to remember but she did. She always did.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>As Dahyun ran outside the pub, she took one of the whiskey bottles with her. The pain was overwhelming. It’s been exactly 3 years. She took a swig as the sadness took control of her; vision clouded by the unending tears pouring from her eyes. As the cold droplets of rain touched her warm skin, she could no longer distinguish her tears from the rain. It hurt, it hurt more than ever because every year she'd remember everything so vividly. Her last touch. Their last kiss. And this time, she was alone. No Chaeyoung to hug her. No Mina to comfort her. No one who could stop her from doing unimaginably stupid things. She was alone, and her heart ached for her lost love.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“SANA!!!”</em>, she screamed from the top of her lungs, looking blindly at the dark sky as she stood at the center of the road.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Sana-chan…”, she was crying profusely now, “why did you leave me?”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And it all happened all too quickly.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>A blinding light.</p><p>A screeching noise.</p><p>The frantic sound of beeping horns.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>Your kiss, my cheek</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>I watched you leave</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>Your smile, my ghost</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>I fell to my knees</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>When you’re young, you just run</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>But you come back to what you need…</strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>(Flashback) </strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Her heart pounded as she walked through the gloomy white hallways, the scent of disinfectant didn’t help; instead, making her more nauseous as she took quick steps towards the last room of the 6th floor. She rushed there as she heard the news, her feelings indescribable. A part of her was giddy; it’s been too long since she last saw the doe-eyed girl, a year too long. But taking into consideration the setting where she was in now, she couldn’t help but feel anxious.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun stopped in front of the door. She took a deep breath as she held the knob firmly. She knew of Sana’s condition. She knew but she was a little too late, and they were a little too broken to face each other just yet. What she didn’t know then was how bad things had gotten, not until she received a phone call from Nayeon herself. It was a short call, but it was loud enough to tell her that things weren’t okay. Things were far from okay. And so she gathered whatever courage was left in her and rushed to this place; to finally see the love of her life. Little did she know that nothing could’ve prepared her for whatever she was about to face behind that door.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>With a few quick knocks, she stepped in ever so lightly.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Their eyes met, and the happiness that devoured her was something she’d never felt before. Laying there in the hospital bed was the girl she longed for all this time; still as beautiful as she remembered.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Dahyunnie…”</em>, were Sana’s first words.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>A shy smile crept into Dahyun’s lips as she slowly took careful steps towards her.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“You came. You finally came”</em>, Sana said breathlessly and Dahyun became aware of how she struggled to form words.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Only then did she notice how different Sana’s become. She’s still the same Sana, only paler and more frail than before. She looked like a fragile flower, as if touching her would break her. This broke Dahyun’s heart more than ever. Her beautiful flower slowly withering away and she couldn’t do anything about it. So she kept it in, kept the tears from flowing, kept the emotions from showing; this time, not because of cowardice, but because she had to be strong now for both of them. She knew well that if she broke in front of Sana, it’d break Sana as well. So she kept it in. For the first time in forever, Dahyun was brave, and Sana loved her for it.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Sana-chan”</em>, Dahyun said as she cupped the older’s face. <em>“It’s been too long.”</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I’ve missed you too Dahyunnie”</em>, Sana replied lovingly.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>With that, Dahyun could no longer hold herself back. She kissed her lips ever so gently, taking in all of her; pouring all her heart into that kiss. She hoped it was enough to tell her all the words she failed to say the entire time they hadn’t seen each other. She wanted Sana to feel everything. She hoped it was enough.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And it was.</p><p>Sana knew.</p><p>She always did.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Dahyun…”</em>, she said breathlessly after the kiss.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun placed their foreheads together and nodded.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Stay with me”</em>, Sana asked.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I will”</em>, Dahyun replied.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Until I breathe my last”</em>, she whispered.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dahyun knew the inevitable. It was a question of when it’ll happen. But she had to be strong now, for both of them. And all that’s left is to accept the reality of their situation; all that’s left is to face the bitter truth. Dahyun was no longer a coward and Sana loved her for it.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“I promise.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>(End of flashback) </strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>***</strong> </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Babe… Why are you crying?”</em>, Mina asked as tears were streaming down Chaeyoung’s cheeks while they were watching a movie.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I don’t know. I… My… My heart suddenly feels so heavy”</em>, Chaeyoung stuttered as she tried to answer her girlfriend.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Mina was silent for a while.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“You felt that too didn’t you?”</em>, Chaeyoung asked, hoping she was wrong.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Mina could only nod in response. As if on cue her phone started ringing.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Jeongyeon-eonni?”</em>, her voice shook as she tried to answer the call.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Chae! Where’s Dubu? Tell me she’s with you. She is right?”</em>, her voice faltering as she inquired through the phone.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Chaeyoung could faintly hear frantic sobbing from the other line and hushed words trying to comfort said voice. She figured it belonged to both Nayeon and Tzuyu.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Tears were starting to pool in Chaeyoung’s eyes. Mina saw how worried her girlfriend was and couldn't help but tear up as well.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“No eonni. She’s not with me. Why?”</em>, she tried her best to answer.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sensing she was on speaker, she heard Nayeon from the background.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Oh god no…”</em>, Nayeon wailed.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Chae… Jihyo called. She… She couldn’t find the heart to tell you…”</em>, Jeongyeon started, swallowing her sobs. <em>“Turn your TV on to channel 8.”</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>DAHYUN’S POV</strong>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They always told me that just a few seconds before you die, you’d have a flashback of every beautiful memory you’ve had. That didn’t happen to me. Instead, it felt like I just woke up from a long satisfying sleep and I saw the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life. She stood just a few meters away from me. She was glowing. Not like rays of light were emitting from her, it was more of like a warm glow. You couldn’t see it, but you can feel it. And god was she perfect at that moment.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>She started walking towards me; her smile ever so sweet.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“Sana… How?”</em>, I asked.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>But Sana didn’t say a word. She kept walking towards me. As she stood in front of me, she engulfed me with a warm embrace and I’ve never felt so light before; like all the worry in the world didn’t exist. It was a comfort I’d never felt before and it felt heavenly.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>I started to tear up, remembering every bad thing I’d done to her. Remembering all the times I neglected her; all the times I lacked, but never acknowledged.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Sana… I’m so sorry. I never got the chance to say sorry. I never apologized for breaking you. I’m sorry I couldn't say-“</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>I never got to finish my sentence when I felt Sana’s soft lips against mine. And if she’d always tasted so sweet before, this kiss was different, she tasted divine and I couldn’t ask for more. Every possible feeling, every unsaid word, every broken promise was mended with that kiss.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>We both knew.</p><p>We both forgave.</p><p>We both understood.</p><p>And we both felt the love.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“It’s time to stop hurting now Dahyun-chan. The moon tonight is too beautiful to ruin”</em>, Sana said as she touched our foreheads together.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I love you Sana…”</em>, was all I could say.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>“I love you too Dahyun”</em>, she answered with a smile.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Let’s go home.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> <strong>This love is good, this love is bad</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>This love is alive back from the dead, oh…</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>This hands had to let it go free, and</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>This love came back to me…</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>This love left a permanent mark</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>This love is glowing in the dark, oh…</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>These hands had to let it go free, and</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em> <strong>This love came back to me…</strong> </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>For Buts...</p><p>Though we may have parted in the most painful of ways, I hope someday we'd be able to meet eye to eye. By then I wish I would be the best version of me and tell you that I'm happy for how everything turned out for both of us. By then, I hope to come back with another kind of love; but know that what we once had will always be one of the best things that happened in my life. Until then, take care of yourself. This is my last gift for you.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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